I'm not criticizing you for seeing 50 Shades of Grey, but I am for something else.

I know, I know, I know. So here’s another 50 Shades of Grey commentary. Hang in there with me. I’m not here to scold you for reading/watching it. I'm not 'judging' (I hate that word so much) you. Matter of fact, I haven’t even read it or watched it, but from friends who have and seeing the trailors, I know what it’s about.

You’ve probably seen lots of articles going around how this 50 Shades franchise promotes sexual violence, rape culture, is anti-feminism, etc.

The best article* I’ve read about it is from the Director of Operations, Bridget Battistoni, of the Seattle based company REST (Real Escape from the Sex Trade).  It talks about how we can normalize anything in society to make it seem acceptable or normal. It explains how Hitler used propaganda to convince an entire nation to not blink an eye at millions of people being murdered, and that the same thing is happening in America with sexual violence. It explains that effective propaganda uses three steps to indoctrinate an idea: 1) Desensitization 2)Normalization 3)Marginalization.

I don’t think that anybody would argue that our society is totally desensitized to sex. It’s everywhere. I can’t walk through downtown Seattle without seeing a 15 ft. billboard of an underwear clad woman. The last Abercrombie and Fitch bag I saw years ago basically had a naked man (can you call him a man? He looked about 15) on it. Seth and I were watching Jimmy Fallon (one of our faves!) and the evening’s performer, Nick Jonas, had scantily clad women dancing behind him to extremely sexualized choreography. It is now totally normal to hook up with people you hardly know and not think twice about it. Normalization. I don’t think we’ve marginalized in society yet, because not everybody agrees on what ‘level’ of public displays of sex/sexuality are appropriate or who with and when it is appropriate to engage in sex.

Regardless, we are totally desensitized to degradation of women too. For example, the show ‘the Bachelor’ is hugely successful, but what is it about? A man lining up a bunch of women like cattle to decide which one he will bestow the honor of being in a relationship with after they’ve completed a series of tasks. Romantic…??

Anyways, I’m not here to tell you that you are a terrible person for participating in any of the following examples, whether it’s the 50 Shades franchise or the Bachelor. But I will say this:

We all have to draw our line somewhere of what we deem ‘appropriate’ to participate in or contribute to, what we allow ourselves to be indoctrinated to. We are a diverse society, and nobody's lines will be in the same place. Some people think it may be totally ok to contribute to the 50 Shades franchise, others not. Some people may be totally ok with not only the 50 Shades franchise, but also put their line even a step farther and say the actual pornography industry is fine, and not just fine, great! Some people will see casual sex as completely normal and acceptable, others not.

And you know what, that’s fine. It’s your prerogative. However, we need to move away from the thought process ‘I just like to watch the Bachelor in my pjs with my girlfriends and eat ice-cream. It doesn’t hurt or affect anybody else" or "I'm just a normal guy, like 'all guys,' who watches porn sometimes. It doesn't matter." Yes it does. Put your line down wherever you want, but quit acting like what you do, watch, and consume doesn’t mean anything or affect anybody. Because it does. It sends a message and is shaping what is perceived as the normal world around us. 

*Battistoni, Bridget. “50 Shades of Propaganda: How You Are Being Indoctrinated to Sexual Violence.” REST Blog. 12 Feb 15.  http://iwantrest.com/blog/post/50-shades-of-propaganda-how-you-are-being-indoctrinated-to-sexual-violence

More Moments in the Emerald City

We’ve finally settled into our new place. It’s been wonderful and exciting, but I am not sure if I will ever fully adjust to the city. I am thankful that we live right next to Seattle University, and within their few little acres are beautifully landscaped and wooded retreats from the traffic and noise. This city is exciting and busy and shiney and new! But loud with lots of people and concrete. Needless to say, Cooper gets walked through SU’s campus most days. We’ve been trying to explore lots of the parks, and we have been so lucky with warm spring weather in the midst of January. We spent an amazing afternoon at Discovery Park yesterday, Seattle’s largest park with beach access. Seth and I grew up on the Alaskan beach, and I spent many many weeks of my childhood camping and fishing on the Pacific, and being back on a west coast beach yesterday felt so very right. This isn’t home, but it is pretty dang close and for that I am grateful.

Other things we’ve done: I think we’ve found the church we’re going to being staying at. Churches aren’t exactly in plethora in Seattle, and this one is excellent. No church is perfect, but this one fits many of my personal preferences. An intellectual pastor who does a mix of expository and topical preaching, diverse array of people of all ages and stages of life, a good balance of high quality music, media, and design without it being the focus, and it’s within walking distance of our apartment. More importantly though, sound doctrine and everyone is just excited to be there. We went to a ‘newcomers dessert’ last night to meet everyone on staff and learn a little bit more. If you’re in the churchy world, chances are you know who Mars Hill Church is, who was based here in Seattle, and that big fall out. It never dawned on me that this church would have to do a lot of healing for people who were a part of Mars Hill. People had lots of questions about how Downtown Cornerstone Church was learning from that situation, and that was definitely addressed. Also, the church itself has a few goals just being part of this city and one of them I thought was really awesome is “for every Seattleite to know and respect 1 Christian.” Seemingly easy task for a Bible belt Roanoke or southern town, but not here. This is an entirely different demographic and way of life.

Lastly, Seth started his job today! Yay and sad! He got a temporary 4-month position as a data analyst. Good resume builder and some income while continuing to look for that long-term position. It is very bittersweet him going back to work though. We needed money like, yesterday, but not going to lie, haven’t hated naps together every day, non-chalantly going to work out, perhaps going to bed at 9pm or 2am, taking Cooper wherever to explore, whatever we want! But this is America, and much of life is spent getting money. But that’s ok. Because I need to restock my pantry to start really cooking again, and there’s only 10,000 restaurants to try so a paycheck will be exciting. I have had some great first and second round interviews  for various PA positions but am currently in the waiting process to hear back decisions. So things are in the works! Until then, just trying to appreciate this time off and I guess it’ll just be me, Coop, and Soph for the afternoon nap.   

Yellow morning light. You can sort of see our mountain view. It's typically pretty foggy in the mornings.

Rainy afternoon. Sophie is adjusting fairly well to being a 100% indoor cat now, although she does angrily meow at the front door when one of us takes Cooper out.

My little getaway spot on Seattle University's campus.

 Dr. Jose Rizal Dog Park

Discovery Park

Discovery Park

BARNACLES AT LOW TIDE! :D I missed those things!

Cool slug! Should have taken a picture with scale. Was probably about 10cm (~4 inches) long.

Seattle Waterfront Pier off Alaskan Way. This is what my happiness looks like. <3

First Moments in the Emerald City

We have arrived in the Emerald City! Hard to believe we woke up in our apartment IN SEATTLE!!! this morning. So crazy! But here’s lots of crazy stories:

1)   Where we are living. We have an AWESOME apartment in the Capitol Hill area of town. Capitol Hill is considered ‘the most hipster neighborhood in the country.’ Aka: lots of young people, food of every origin you can imagine, and stuff to-do galore from bike polo (witnessed it ourselves last night) to wine tasting to live music. More importantly, the apartment is pet friendly, literally about 200 yards from all the hospitals I’m applying for, less then a mile to downtown where Seth is applying for many of his jobs, and bonuses: has a washer & dryer and dishwasher. Super bonuses: has a rooftop deck, work out room, and a bike storage room.  Super duper bonuses: it is a brand new building, certified green/energy efficient, and our apartment has a view of the mountains. The story of how we got it: we found it by way of a family friend spotting it on craigslist for us. The couple moving out needed somebody to take over their lease by January 2^nd (the day we were arriving), so they were willing to hugely subsidize the rent to get somebody in there, AND they were leaving ALL of their furniture (everything from the couch to the toaster to a few rolls of toilet paper. EVERYTHING). Did I mention Seth and I didn’t own a single piece of furniture? We put our applications in ASAP frantically from my sister’s kitchen table in Boise, our family friend came and checked it out for us just to make sure it was legit, and we got it. We had to pull over in the middle of nowhere central Oregon en route here and create a hotspot to sign our lease online. Thank God, literally, for modern technology. Upon picking up our keys, the property manager informed us there was a long line of people behind us wanting it too.  So long story short, we have an awesome, convenient apartment that came full of furniture that we could have never originally afforded.

2)   Totally different way of life for us. I walk to the grocery store (found one only 0.6 miles away! Hurray!). Our apartment building is certified “LEED” energy efficient, and Seattle is super ‘green.’ EVERYBODY recycles, you won’t find a single plastic grocery bag in the city, you have to pay for paper bags (bring reusable ones), and starting this year, you get fined if you don’t compost (all food waste gets recycled).  Parking is a nightmare on purpose to get people to walk and bike more, and there are really safely sectioned off bike lanes. I like it. It feels good to take care of our planet. 

3)  Church. Went to a really good church this morning! It was such a strange sight seeing an entire auditorium of hipstery, young people all singing about Jesus this morning, but also really cool. In a shifting culture and one of the most liberal (if not THE most..Portland maybe is #1?) cities in America, young people still gather to worship and learn about Jesus. I liked that too. Lots.  

4)   Jobs. We don’t have them yet (emphasis on YET!). But other awesome thing that happened: My dream job that I was declined for in December actually called me literally as we were driving into the city to set up a meeting to talk about the position some more. Also, found out my cousin has an awesome connection at the company Seth is really interested in working at. So things are in the works!

Overall, we have been incredibly blessed, and God is taking care of us in huge ways and in the small details. In large ways: finding us this ridiculous perfect apartment and working it out so it was in our budget. In small ways: so many examples, but here’s one: Obviously since we don’t have jobs we are seriously pinching pennys anywhere we can to survive while jobs are worked out but today we had to get new phones because Seth’s totally died (perfect timing, right? Applying for jobs and have zero extra money). BUT! We were able to get some $$ credited to our account unexpectedly so our phone bill will actually be smaller next month!! So many things like that have happened, and to God be the glory. We left Roanoke in a huge leap of faith with a car full of stuff, our animals, and a small savings account for how expensive this place is, and over and over again God is providing for us on all fronts. Only by His perfect grace and planning are we able to make this giant transition as smoothly as it has gone, and we are so thankful for the people who have helped us in so many different ways during this transition. 

Hello again mountains, conifers, and Pacific Ocean. It feels good to see you again. 

The Great Migration: Day 3 and 4

Yesterday, December 19th and day 3 of our drive, my computer died in the car, and I was too busy visiting to write where we stopped. We drove from Lincoln, NE to Laramie, WY. I don’t ever want to drive across Nebraska ever again. There was absolutely nothing besides more and more flatness, no towns to even look at, and it smelt bad the entire way (manure). Kansas and Missouri were far more interesting. But! We made it Laramie, WY to stay with the Berry clan. Mike was our campus pastor in Marietta and relocated to WY with his wife, Amber, and two kids, Eli (9) and Savannah (6). We love those guys so much, and Eli and Savannah are the best kids.

If our kids are half as wonderful as Savannah and Eli are, I’m excited to have kids. Eli is the kindest boy, and at 9, without being told, asked if there was anything he could help me with when I was loading up the trunk this morning and enthusiastically carried out lots of stuff for me. Only 9 and is wanting to help and serve others. And he is so smart! His little mind is so curious about the world and it’s fun listening to him talk about all the different interests he has as he gets older. Maybe this is a strange thing to say about a 9-year-old boy, but he is going to be the greatest husband to the luckiest lady someday. Savannah is just the cutest girl, so sweet and cuddly but sassy and funny. She was snuggling with me on the couch but throwing out old jokes at her mom at the same time. Ha! I also love that they are both really tech savvy, knowing how to use any and all Apple products, but yet last night they still asked to play cards and a board game. I think that is a great attestation to how great their parents are. Sorry to get all sappy, but just what a relief to see a healthy family together amidst the craziness of this world. Seth and I listen to a news podcast (most) every morning by a guy named Al Mohler, and he often talks about the latest dismal statistics and studies of broken homes and the demise of families in this era. Sometimes after listening I just feel hopeless, but spending time with the Berry family reminds me that God is redeeming families.

So anyways, it was a great visit yesterday. Today, day 4, we are headed west on I-80 through the rest of Wyoming, swinging down by Salt Lake City, and then up to Boise as the final destination today!!!! My big sis and brother-in-law are in Boise, and I am so thankful to have a solid break from long driving days to spend Christmas with them. Between finishing up school, studying, taking boards, packing, and moving, Seth and I haven't had a little break for months and months, every weekend occupied with something so this is long overdue staycation and family time. Just 471 more miles to go today…

PS. 60 miles outside of Boise it started POURING down rain, where the straps that hold the car top carrier enter the car started leaking profusely all over me, Seth, and the animals, and we got delayed behind 2 wrecks. Today we experience 50+ mph winds, fog, snow, sleet, and rain. A perfectly sunny morning in Wyoming turned into road trip from hell an hour from our destination. However, I am very happy to be sitting on Rach and Nic’s couch, eating all their food, and snuggling their dog.

Coop being extra cute in our hotel in Lincoln, NE, ready to go the following morning.

The only interesting thing to see the entire trek across Nebraska.

Animal cuteness.

Welcome to Wyoming!

Sophie helping Seth navigate.

SAFEWAY!!!!! :D Now we are getting close to the west coast!

More animal cuteness.

Pit stop in Wyoming.

Geology in Utah.

Utah is beautiful. I-80 West.

Idaho.

Finally made it to Boise and Coop met his fur-cousin, Griffey, for the first time.